Guess What I Am?

Hoonless. That's what. ;(

The Gift

Yesterday my teeny, tiny, Vietnamese Buddhist nun student brought me another gift. (She's brought me such gifts in the past as the White Diamonds collection by Elizabeth Taylor). This was just a small gift. In a ziplock bag she had 2 fruit-flavored jello snack packs, a spoon, 2 mini snickers, and a granola bar. Melt my heart.

With Marsha As My Witness...

A bird pooped on my butt yesterday in the park.

*Disclaimer

I feel the need to make a disclaimer after my last post. I will NOT be held responsible for you quitting your job. If you choose to do so, you must accept full responsibility for your decision. I will NOT be funding you over the summer. I WILL, however, significantly increase the level of fun you may be having. But those are the only promises I make. If you're looking for a bailout, call the government. I hear they're handing those out. I happen to have a job wherein summer work was optional, so clearly I opted out. If that option is also available to you, clearly you should opt out. But quit responsibly.

Also I thought of some other possible activities:
-baseball games
-responsible campfires
-demolition derbies
-sewing our own swimwear
-morning movies
-looking at the stars
-that new bizarro water park right off the freeway in Sandy

Let me know if you're interested.

This Summer...

I've decided not to work. I know, I know. In this economy it seems so ungrateful to turn down my employment opportunity, but really I'm so stoked to sit around and do nothing. I'm trying to get others to join me. Turn down work. Decline. Thanks, but no thanks. What good is that job doing you? Will your fancy job sit with you by the pool and sip on slurpees? Doubtful. But you know who will? Me.
Now I realize that most of you are pretty responsible, and I commend you for that. So if you're not dedicated to experimenting with laziness, I have thought of another alternative. I'll give you the option of signing up for a day to hang out with me. You can take off a day and we can plan an activity to do together (you know you have way more vacay days than you'll ever use). That way I'll feel like less of a loser for doing nothing in the summer and you will have a chance to relax.
I'm going out of town a lot this summer, so there won't actually be too many days to sign up for, and they're filling up fast.
There are some standard activities you can choose from:
-swimming
-going to the mountains
-drive in
-popsicles
-watching the golden girls
-watching murder, she wrote
-liberty land
-going to the park
I think those are all the standard options. If you have another idea, you may submit it for approval.

My Students Are Still Cute...

The other day I was helping a student with a paragraph he was writing. His spoken English is really pretty good, but his reading and writing are pretty low. I got to a word I couldn't make out. It was "ebritink". Turns out it was supposed to be "everything". So cute.

ATTENTION

Everyone needs to CHILL THE FREAK OUT ABOUT SWINE FLU! Especially you, NPR.